Death

[Vyn]

I nuked the Racism thread - some of the responses were interesting, and telling, regardless of length.

So here's one that shouldn't scare anyone, maybe: Death.

We're all gonna die. One of our Community brothers already has. Regardless of anyone's view about what happens after they die, death is a universal fate for us who belong to the genus Homo. And we all do.

What does having a good death look like to you? Dying gallantly in battle against your enemies? Living to a very old age, in a home, but passing along wisdom to the younger generations until one day you just don't wake up? And countless other ways?

Similarly, would you want a funeral/ritual/remembrance of some sort? Embalmed and gussied up in a $15,000 casket? Corpse tossed into the woods to be scavenged to dust? And again, countless other ways?

Myself, I want to die unexpectedly. Or at least with very little lead-in. I don't want to linger at death's door in a hospice for nine months, causing nothing but grief for my family. When it's time for me to go, I just want to go. Dying in my sleep would be nice. Peaceful.

I've never concerned myself with what happens to my putrid corpse. I've often told my wife to just drop me off some dirt road like assholes do with trash, at least something might live a little longer by chowing down on me. She didn't find that appropriate.

So I gave it some thought, and determined that I would like to be burned on an open funeral pyre. It just seems "majestic" and decidedly non-western civ. Bzzt, that shit's illegal. I would have to go to another country (there are a few that allow it) to do that. And since that would all be up to my non-dead family and friends, I'd rather not burden them with such nonsense.

I finally decided upon a very ancient ritual that is:

1. legal
2. enviro-friendly
3. aligns with my attitude

I'll have a small wake at my home, my family will cart me off to the cemetery, wherein a hole will be dug into the earth. They'll wrap me in a shroud and chuck my not-yet rotting corpse into the hole. Back fill the hole, and in about two months there will be nothing left but bones. Fantastic! 



 

[Zzzptm]

There are *rules* about "final care", and that's why the funeral industry is able to provide for many who enter the profession.

Because of said rules, my wife and I have already purchased and paid for our plots and caskets and what-not. When I die, I don't want my survivors to have to shell out any more than is necessary.

Having that out of the way, I know I'll have remembrance services and such. It's how we do things at my church, where I've been for 29 years thus far, and am likely to be there until I do die. It's my neighborhood, my roots, my place. Wherever I die, I'll be remembered here, close to my home.

The remembrance and the funeral are important for those still alive to come to terms. They're rituals to mark the passage and to deal with the finality of things. They allow for those who mourn to share the burdens and to come together and heal each other. I've got some songs picked out for myself that I'd like to be sung at that gathering and I know that there will be good friends of mine that will speak the truth about me, and that will be good.

I am remiss in not having yet drafted my will. I need to do that. Dying intestate is a huge, anguished mess for the survivors. That happened to my wife's father, and there was a real crime when his girlfriend got to the cash in the wall before anyone else. I don't want that.

I've seen people close to passing, and it's often something that happens in a hospital or at home, in bed, not feeling at all well. I've seen demetia set in before death, and that is what I don't want to have to face. Of course, once I face it, it's not really going to be something I can be aware of, but I'd hate to have my last days on earth be where I can't recognize people I love.

I like how Ambrose Bierce checked out: he got over 70 and decided to go get involved in the Mexican Revolution. Loads of adventure and he went out in a flash by way of a firing squad. I don't know if I could do the same... the drug cartels might play some dirty pool, and I'd rather not risk that.

[Zzzptm]

There was one time when I was flying over the Atlantic and the plane hit some massive turbulence. I thought, maybe, just maybe, this is it.

So I put on my headphones and played Van Halen's "Panama". It's very good music for turbulence.

And I do think that when we're dead, our spirits are able to continue in association with each other. I think there's some stigma in how some people die and some respect for other ways. Most will get empathy, "It happened to me, too..."

But if you go out with panache, there's some measure of, "Hey, cool, wish I had thought of that!" Helps with meeting folks and making new friends.

Then there are those who will be shunned. They may have had power in mortality, but where they cannot kill or have someone killed, they have nothing. I believe that those who they wronged will declare that wrong done to that person, and that person will have to listen and then bear the truth of that deed.

I wrote a story on that idea, called "Mao Zedong Experiences a Setback."  https://zzzptm.com/wordpress/?p=799